My Name Is Miss Pink Slip, and I’m a Shopaholic

confessionsIn order to save a few bucks on Saturday night, I stayed home and watched a movie on Comcast Pay-Per-View – the frothy, silly, yet somewhat entertaining “Confessions of a Shopaholic” with “Wedding Crashers” cutie Isla Fisher (fabulous hair) and my new favorite heartthrob, Hugh Dancy.

I related to the lead character’s pulse race upon having Henri Bendel’s iconic brown-and-white striped shopping bag looped around her arm. As she passes the mannequins whispering sweet nothings to her on Fifth and Madison Aves. As she drinks to be brave enough to open her bills. As she ultimately sells all of her belongings to pay off her credit card debt. No, I haven’t sold my clothes. I’ve just shopped in that SoHo warehouse where they set her sale. Actually, it’s a church reception hall in NYC where craftsmen sell jewelry, clothing and handbags. I recognized the address on the fake flyer in the film. That was the scariest realization of all.

I’ve known this for a while. I knew it pre-, pre-, pre-recession and pre-layoff. But, seeing it satirized on screen, it became real for me. I, Miss Pink Slip, am a shopaholic.

Now, I’m not a shopaholic in the film’s over-the-top sense. I own no Louboutins (although, I greatly covet them), and the only couture I’ve seen up close was at the Met last weekend at “The Model as Muse” exhibit.  That said, I’m best friends with the trinity: TJ Maxx, Marshalls and Loehmann’s. Half-price books at the Strand and on Amazon.com make me smile more than, well, Hugh Dancy. I have so much sh*t in my closet it’s unreal….and I have unreal debt to match.

So what’s a girl to do? Well, I’m trying to make a wholehearted effort to curtail the shopping. I’ve got to get a life and pay off the cards. And no, I’m not telling you how much there is to pay off. I’m keeping that little bit of denial for myself. Plus, I don’t want all you ever-so-helpful “credit counselors” stalking me.

Can I do it? Ha! As I’m typing this, my sister just emailed me a 30% off coupon for Old Navy, Gap and Banana Republic. The demons are already upon me!

Any tips? I pray I’m not beyond hope.

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3 responses to “My Name Is Miss Pink Slip, and I’m a Shopaholic

  1. Don’t do it!! Paying 30% off is still paying 70% too much when you have debt to pay off. I’m obviously still learning and struggling with my shopping demons as well.. but just DON’T shop, as much as you can possibly NOT shop. For me, that means making bigger grocery and errand shopping trips half as often to save money and gas.

    Good luck!!

  2. Oh, CFB, you’re too right! I’m trying!

  3. Hey Miss Pink Slip,
    Confession time: I, too, am a shopaholic. For me it’s the “thrill of the hunt” – or getting something on super-sale – that drives me to shop. But I’ve found an equal thrill in selling my castoffs for cash (which, admittedly, usually goes towards new purchases!). You might want to try this “cure” as well. The first step is to find an upscale consignment shop in your area. Cull your closet for the best designer stuff that you KNOW you won’t wear again, and consign them. You can also sell on eBay, but I find this is more trouble than it’s worth. For labels that are more young & trendy (eg, Forever 21, Charlotte Russe, etc.) there are what I call “downscale consignment chains” like Crossroads Clothing and Buffalo Exchange where they’ll give you cash on the spot for the stuff they take. And finally: for the stuff that no one wants – but is still wearable/usable – don’t forget about Goodwill, The Salvation Army, or similar charities where you can write off the donations come tax time!

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