Tag Archives: Lifetime

Broke and Can’t Go Out Tonight? Settle In For LMN’s Pick-A-Flick

lmnIf you’re like me, money is tight and I can really only go out once or twice a week. In fact, most Friday nights, I stay home because I’m also exhausted!

On those evenings, I’ve been known to catch a Lifetime movie…or five. It’s pretty pathetic, but I know there are millions of you out there who – like me – have a secret love for crawling on the couch with a blanket, a Skinny Cow, a stack of trashy magazines and lounging while three or four Lifetime movies play out. 

I probably know more about these fine films than I should ever own up to. So when LMN started its Pick-A-Flick night, I was intrigued. Here’s how it works:

LMN will be letting its audience choose which movie the Network will air on Fridays at 8 p.m. and 10 p.m. Log onto myLifetime.com/flick where you’ll find a selection of five dramaramas, cheesy comedies and/or ridiculous romances. You can vote as many times as you like for your campy fave the week prior to that Friday.

This week,maid of honor your choices are “Maid of Honor,” perfect bride-to-be, a man and his psycho sister-in-law (from deceased wife) who wants him bad; “The Last Trimester,” baby murder; “Cries in the Dark,” lady cop’s sister gets killed; “A Teacher’s Crime,” teacher, student, dad, trouble; and “Double Cross,” sad wives and mystery. LMN’s even going to have themes. 

Maybe they’ll consider doing special “nights” starring our beloved Lifetime divas like  Ann Jillian, Tori Spelling, Cheryl Ladd, Lindsay Wagner along with Candace Cameron Bure, Kelli Martin and Tracey Gold (I could go on and on!).

For the record, I voted for “Maid of Honor”–Love me some Linda Purl…fingers crossed!

And, yes…I do have a life. It just starts on Saturday. 🙂

Life Without Lifetime: Should MPS “Cut the Cord on Cable”?

It’s so funny that Christopher Lawton’s piece on the recession and cable ran in Thursday morning’s Wall Street Journal. While I was en route to work and listening to NPR (which I haven’t done in a LONG time), I was thinking about a long-held vision of nixing my cable. I kept shaking my head and saying to myself, “it’ll never happen”… “what would I do without ‘Gossip Girl’?” Ever since my last day on the old job in December and even now that I’m employed again, I’ve been contemplating what just might happen if I only had basic cable or, worse, no cable at all!!!

GASP!  tv460

I might actually read more books, take more walks, mingle among more humans or even write that novel percolating in my head for the past 10 years (I know, everyone wants to write a novel. How cliche!). God forbid any of that healthy activity come to pass!

In fair disclosure, I did take my cable package down a notch while I was unemployed (and it stays that way today). My friends were shocked then, and that was just getting rid of about 50 extra channels. But (and that’s a BIG BUT), it eliminated my access to offerings such as the Lifetime Movie Network.

Before you chastise and laugh at me, let me just say one thing: LIFETIME IS EVERY WOMAN’S GUILTY PLEASURE. Why do you think every chick lit novel known to [wo]man references the network? I don’t care who you are. You know you feel a twinge of excitement riding up your leg every time you see another airing of sorority drama “Dying to Belong” (starring a young, 90210-era Hilary Swank) or “Willing to Kill: The Texas Cheerleader Story” featuring a fabulously deranged Lesley Ann Warren with a hot-rolled coif as big as the state of Texas itself. 

To answer your question: Yes, I have regular Lifetime, but LMN is uninterrupted, mindless melodrama 24/7. No episodes of “Frasier” or “Reba” (which I watch…secretly…) to screw up the movie momentum.

Sadly, television obsession is not a new thing for me. Since I was a kid, I’ve been fixated with the boob tube. In fact, there’s an urban legend out there that I used to discuss “Dallas” with my first grade teacher every week in school. Hmmm… might be some truth to that. I watched everything from “Gimme a Break”, “That’s Incredible!” and “Trapper John, M.D.” to “She’s the Sheriff”, “Small Wonder” and the Saturday morning NBC classic “Hang Time”. Didn’t matter how crappy, I was there supporting our small-screen stars with eyes possessed.

So, what would I do without the Oxygen Channel, CNN, ESPN (I love college football!) or even NBC? I’ve proved I can get along without IFC or even HBO, but basic networks? Seriously, I don’t know if I could do it. I don’t care how many Hulus are out there online. I don’t care how many reality shows pollute the airwaves. TV is as comforting to me as a quilt from home, mashed potatoes or a hug from my Daddy. When we’re experiencing the times we are, it’s the little things that help us forget our troubles.

So, why should I rid myself of such a simple pleasure now when I need it the most? What do you think? Have you let your cable go? You dare me to give mine the pink slip?

I know. I need to get a life.


(photo: The Guardian, U.K.)

Mindless Movie Monday: Forever Love

rebaConfession: I watch “Reba”. I know! I know! It’s the worst TV program ever cast, produced and put on the air. Well, maybe “Small Wonder” and “She’s the Sheriff” were worse, but I digress. “Reba” has served as a so-terrible-it’s fabulous escape in times of stress. And who can’t love Reba McEntire? Well, if you put the TV on mute. If I weren’t from the south, I wouldn’t think that super-country accent was even possible.

So today’s Mindless Movie is for the Reba-devoted (wherever you are). Reba stars with Tim Matheson (such a hottie from “Animal House”) and Bess Armstrong (mom from underrated amazing teen drama “My So-Called Life” — ahhhh, Jordan Catalano!) in a cheese-tastic TV movie about a wife and mom who wakes up from a 20-year coma to find her daughter is getting married and her best friend is putting the emotional make on her long-suffering, still-in-love-with-her lawyer hubby. Drama ensues.

Lifetime Movie Network, 2 p.m. ET

Tonight on Lifetime: Mother, May I Sleep With Danger?

Too broke to go out tonight?

Tune into Lifetime at 9 p.m. ET to see Tori Spelling (long red hair as well as short blonde hair – Wow!) tangle it up with Ivan Sergei’s psycho Billy/Kevin Shane. This movie isn’t half as riveting as “Co-Ed Call Girl”, but we take what we can get, don’t we?


From LifetimeTV.com: “Based on the book by Claire R. Jacobs. A naive college student (Tori Spelling) falls in love with a charming pathological liar, credit card scammer and murderer (Ivan Sergei). When her mother (Lisa Banes) attempts to break off the relationship, the crazed boyfriend abducts her daughter and hides her in his cabin in the woods.”

This crap movie was actually a book?!?  

Better question: Has a more potent question ever been posed than “Mother, May I Sleep With Danger”?

Mindless Movie Monday

“Baby for Sale” on Lifetime today at  2 p.m. ET

From MyLifetime.com: “Nathalie and Steve have the perfect relationship, home and careers. Now they want a child to make their lives complete. But while trying to adopt, the couple stumbles upon an illegal baby-trafficking ring. They’ll risk it all to protect one newborn in their effort to bring down this black-market operation. Inspired by a true story.”

Drama, drama, drama starring Dana Delany (“China Beach”, “Desperate Housewives”). 


Friday Night Lights

Could anMy Friday Night Lightything be more pathetic?

With no regular paycheck coming in, my social life has pretty much ground to a halt. My excitement consists of drooling over Coach Taylor on “Friday Night Lights”, watching “moment of truth” movies on Lifetime and maybe sipping on something from the Under $6 wine section at Trader Joe’s.

There is an upside: I rarely wake up hungover or tired, and I often get a lot done. I recently pulled into the Target parking lot at 9:30 a.m. I didn’t even recognize myself! Who knew it would take unemployment to make a responsible citizen out of me?