“How NOT to Apologize” by Tiger Woods

I couldn’t bring myself to watch Tiger Woods’ self-aggrandizing “apology” today.

As everyone knows, the golf phenom took to the international airwaves an hour ago to publicly apologize for his “irresponsible and selfish” behavior. He went on to confirm his many affairs with many mistresses, say how much he disappointed everyone, how his wife should be praised, blah blah blah. Some people may buy it, but I don’t. And I’m pretty sure there are millions of others out there who see beyond this highly scripted, choreographed and tightly managed dog and pony show. Despite his coming forward today (two months after the sh*t initially hit the fan), people will still be talking about Tiger for quite some time to come. It’s not going to go away soon.

A lesson for all of us mere mortals in the work world – employed and otherwise: If you’ve done something wrong, own up to it. In a timely fashion. In a sincere manner. Don’t wait for the perfect moment to present itself. It never will. Two  months after the fact is just ridiculous. Just take responsibility for your actions up front, and people will have much more respect for you in the long run. Trust me.

At Least Someone’s Hiring: Tiger Mistress Rachel Uchitel Gets Job at “Extra”

This morning while scanning my proud paper of record, The New York Post, I saw the news that Tiger Woods’ ho Rachel Uchitel has landed a new gig at “Extra”. Apparently, she was on the show with Mario Lopez the other night and impressed the producers so much that they’ve hired her on as a “special correspondent”.

Dear God.

From the Post: “A show source added, ‘She won’t talk about Tiger, but she talks about how she wants to find a husband and have kids. She only has a few real friends left whom she trusts. She is alone a lot and spends time with her two dogs. She seems very vulnerable.'”

Boo-hoo. My heart aches for her. Well, I guess it’s better to be paid by Warner Bros. than it is to be paid by Tiger.

What a great message Rachel is sending out to women. If your opportunities seem slim, just hook up with a married athlete, shame yourself in the national media and watch the prospects pile up.

Read more: http://www.nypost.com/p/pagesix/soft_landing_XH2tZ9zHQ2vUxTsZI3tgXP#ixzz0f8wEzcYd

What YOU Job Hunters Can Learn From Tiger’s Ho

When I got back inside from taking my dog to potty, I flipped on the “Today” show to see a tease for an interview with one of Tiger’s now infamous women, Jamie Jungers. According to America’s most popular morning show, this would be Jamie’s first live interview. 

Now, I’m sure Jamie is trying to either 1) clear her name and set the record straight or 2) get an offer to pose for Playboy (although, I’m sure Larry Flynt will be first at bat on that one). That’s why most scandalized people hit the airwaves with their tawdry tales. Sadly, during the piece, Jamie told Meredith Viera “I got nothing out of this relationship but a broken heart.” Awww….

The fact that “Today” sank so low to conduct this interview is only mildly surprising  (hello, ratings!). The fact that Meredith Viera was handed the reins and not, say, Kathie Lee or Hoda, also causes pause. My #1 problem with this interview, though, lies in the subject’s choice of attire.

Girlfriend, if you’re going on national television with a goal of setting the record straight and repairing your reputation, for God’s sake don’t do it while sporting bleached blonde hair, a fur jacket and six-inch black hooker boots!

Why is this relevant to you job hunters?

Because when you’re going on a job interview, your goal should be to put your best, most professional face forward. You have to appear credible. Axe the extraneous piercings, bring your hair back to a natural shade and leave the club clothes at home. I’m not saying you have to appear ultra-conservative – just appropriate and like you have a brain in your head.

I realize this woman could care less what I think, but I hope her mistakes will help others. Frankly, that’s about the only thing we can hope to get out of this interview.

Holiday Help Wanted: More Women Needed to Come Forward as Tiger Woods’ Mistresses

Looking for a P/T holiday job that doesn’t involve folding sweaters at the Gap, selling Christmas trees or working the register at a Wal-Mart?

Well, it appears that emerging as one of Tiger Woods’ mistresses is just the ticket you need for a little extra holiday cash.

As of this morning, up to 10 women have reportedly come forward with allegations that they have had relationships with the golf phenom. These gals all seem to be club “promoters”, cocktail waitresses or, as in one report, a pancake house waitress.  I guess boinking the married-with-kids God of Golf is a hell of a lot better than slinging blueberry pancakes and eggs.

According to some reports, Rachel Uchitel may have already been paid a million dollars for her silence, and Jamiee Grubbs has sold her soul story in exchange for the cover of this week’s US Weekly. Who’s next? If you’d even been hit on by Tiger, would you trade your dignity for a chance at a pay-off? Could certainly help pay those holiday bills. 

For ongoing coverage:
http://msn.foxsports.com/golf/story/10455648